Warfighter

No, I'm not Ed. I'm his friendly, neighborhood webmaster. All the same, I wanted everyone who reads his blog to know that Ed is back, safely in the US. I'm sure he'll give us a nice update here when he's un-jet-lagged and had some time to catch his breath.

While you're waiting for a blog post, be sure and send Ed a nice email (via the "Contact" link above) to let him know how happy we are to have him back home!

Sometimes it felt like I'd never get to write this but I am so excited to finally do so...

Any mail sent after now may not get here before we depart for HOME!!!! Wahooo!!!! After one of the most amazing trips (and very much needed escapes) of my life, I am SO ready to get out and get back to real people and real friends and real life.

I only have like 3 minutes to write here so a better update will have to wait. I wanted to take the opportunity to let you know now not to send any more mail. Of course, any mail that doesn't make it to me while I'm here will eventually find me at home. In case anyone was in the process of putting something together and still wanting to send it, you can send it to my home address which is:

1619 S. 108th E Ave.
Tulsa, OK 74128

I'll be there to receive in about a month from now.

Right now I'm in Kuwait making my way back into the the sandbox (Iraq) from the most wonderful R&R I could have ever imagined for myself.

For now there's still a bit of work to do and duty calls so until next time, I love you and am too excited for the chance to be getting back soon.

Sorry it's been a while. There's so much I've wanted to write about but I'm very short on time and just want to post this update...

Well. You haven't felt loneliness until you've been the only single person on an entire resort! I think even couples could feel lonely here. If you're not a family of at least 3 or more, you're kind of out of your league here. It's so overwhelming all there is to do and see and experience and share. My room has two beds each big enough for two people and an all glass wall that opens out to a balcony with a direct view of the breathtaking Bavarian Alps! The mountain peak Zugspitze is the highest in Germany and is right outside my back door! The first thing I see each morning!

So far I'm on day 6 I think of this 15 day vacation. I've been all over the place in Germany (including the oldest town in the country and another city three different times!), driven through Luxembourg, a small village and two cities including Brussels (very beautiful at night) in Belgium. Didn't make Amsterdam. Also I've been in the Alps of Bavaria, Switzerland (super duper WOW!), and Austria and had meals in each of those places. Finally I did a walking tour of the 27 mile long country (or principality) of Leichtenstein, the last absolute monarchy in Europe. I missed the chance to hit the club in Germany. Very disappointed about that.

Still so much more to do. I've only been to one of the 6 countries that I've made mandatory for myself on this trip. A couple more things to do in Germany and then I'm Italy-bound. From there I'll still have Spain, France, England, and Scotland. I've got to get a move on.

From this point on the trip gets a bit more complicated with no resorts or friends' places to stay until Scotland. Oughtta be great fun and ripe for stories!!!

It was another typical day at work as part of the quick reaction force (QRF). I’m the truck commander (TC) of a three-person truck team (including the gunner and the driver). My truck ventured off solo on a routine check of an overwatch point some ways from our main camp. So there we were pretty relaxed, just another 120 degree day in the 'hood heading back toward our base camp when my driver noticed something. There were two passenger vehicles parked parallel to one another just off the roadside as we passed. She (my driver) tells me that she saw a local man squatting between the two vehicles with a fuel can and a scarf. You could tell she was trying to cope with what she just saw. My gunner immediately spins in the gun turret to the rear to check it out. Meanwhile she repeats more confidently what she’d just seen.

As soon as what she’s telling me registers, it was like my vision was suddenly coated with a dark tint and the world went bleak before my eyes. Reflexively my mind went into denial and began scrambling for ways to rationalize what it was they were seeing that was surely perfectly normal and non-threatening and how it could be perceived wrong. I asked my gunner to verify what he saw and he assured that indeed there was a man crouched between two vehicles on the side of the road with a fuel can pouring fuel onto a scarf. (For the record, the presumption here is that the scarf is will be used as a fuse for what appears to be a car bomb or worse- two car bombs.) My heart sank.

There we were, a single gun truck away from any immediate support and just outside of communication range of our short-range hand radio. I grabbed the long-range radio (the phone type one that you see me using in two of the photos published here) and tried to make contact with my supervisor but couldn’t reach him. At this point I really started becoming anxious. “Should we turn around and go back[to the scene]?” my driver asked me. My goodness the last thing I wanted to do was order these soldiers to drive us back into the nucleus of a potential major blast area of one or even two car bombs. Those are very slim odds for us any way we approach it and without the ability to contact our people at the camp we won’t even have help on the way. Whatever was going to happen was going to rest completely with us three and us alone. No one would even know anything had happened with us for a long time if things went bad. They wouldn’t be missing us for at the very least another half hour and possibly another few hours.

‘No no no.’ Everything in me said that we were just going to assume my soldiers were just being overly cautious. ‘Yeah that’s it.’ We are only blocks away from the camp. We’ll just continue on with what we were doing and everything will be fine. Besides, I don’t want to make the decision to take these two soldiers with me into a bleak situation. That’s a VERY hard call to make.

But then I had a visualization. What if I’m wrong? What if just moments from now we feel the concussion of a massive explosion only blocks away from our main camp? How many lives will be lost? Could I have prevented it? ------- AW SHOOT!!

“Turn around” I solemnly ordered, careful not to display my great reservation and bleak outlook on what we were about to do. I pulled out my pistol and chambered a round. My gunner heard the action of my nine mil, and I heard the sound of his guns echo the same. ‘What are the infinitely minimal odds that I’d find myself in this position?’ I was asking myself. With my rank, I lead a team in combat operations. Once in a while I will have to fill in for my direct-line supervisor and lead the whole squad. But it would take some dire circumstances for me to find myself leading an entire operation. Heaven knows I absolutely HATED having to take those soldiers into that situation with me.
In reality, even had the other trucks and higher command been with us it is likely that a single truck would have been assigned to do the same thing. So there’d be little difference had I wound up being the one chosen. I guess it’s just psychologically comforting having that safety net of other trucks on standby and higher command calling the shots.

The severity of it all was heightened by the fact that only hours before, when we started the shift, it was put out during our daily brief that just two days prior a convoy had been ambushed only three miles from our location. Fortunately the assailants were killed or captured and the weapons cache they’d used was discovered only one mile from our location. This is a very significant event because the area we are in is pretty heavily guarded so the combatants are managing to breach some of this security.

As we approached the scene again my gunner instructed my driver to pass the two cars, whip around and pull up behind them. Once in place, I saw about three men at the cars stop what they were doing abruptly and face us with “uh oh” expressions on their faces. I opened my door and motioned for the one closest to me to come towards me. He looked at his comrades then looked at me as if to say “who, me?” I repeated the motion more deliberately but careful to maintain as much cover behind my opened armored door as I could.

You could tell he was nervously afraid. He started slowly toward me as I continued gesturing. He would take a few steps then hesitate and look back at his comrades as if second guessing whether he should continue and hoping to be rescued. As he got closer and closer he’d repeat this process. His comrades at first started to join him when they saw his fear but my gunner ordered them to stay back. Once he was within range I asked him if he could speak English. He said no. Typical. So I asked him what was going on using simple words and a lot of body language. In similar fashion, he started explaining something unintelligible to me, as I regrettably expected. I’d hoped to heaven that we could resolve the situation from the limited protection of my armored hummer. But to get to the bottom of this all, I was going to have to expose myself. I instructed my gunner to keep his eyes on the other men and to be ready and vigilant, as I would have to approach the two vehicles and the other men.

As soon as I got up to the cars, the man I was speaking to began trying to explain what I was asking to his comrades and simultaneously one of them put his hand out to shake mine. I certainly was in no mood for hand shaking. But at the same time, I didn’t want to give reason for any more alarm and unease than there already was. So not taking my attention at all off of who I was speaking with and not changing my facial expression at all, I briefly grabbed his hand. They each knew very few words in English and once everyone understood what I wanted to know, they made collective effort to explain. I noticed a spill between the two cars and pointed toward it asking what the liquid was. Beginning to sense what my concern was, they scrambled to put me at ease. Finally one of them remembered the English word they were all looking for. “Water! Water!” “Where is the container?” I asked and illustrated with my hands. They looked puzzled. “Open the trunk,” I demanded as I pointed. The man that had approached me at my truck summoned another man who was sitting at the wheel of the vehicle. That man produced the car keys and passed them back. As the man unlocked the trunk I stepped back and off to the side not sure what to expect to see.

Slowly the lid rose as I braced myself. To my surprise, and delightfully so, it was empty save a ratty empty old container lying on its side in the far corner. “Okay,” I said, “Is that all?” The man replied eagerly “Yes yes.” I moved forward just a bit and caught a glimpse of something else just as the man was shutting the trunk lid looking fearfully relieved. “Wait a minute. Open it back up!” The fear immediately returned to all of the men. By this time I’d noticed in my peripheral vision that my gunner had dismounted the truck and approached halfway between me and the truck on my flank. That was a relieving sight since I’d found myself in such close quarters and significantly outnumbered by the men. The man with the keys re-opened the trunk and watched me carefully. I stepped closer and a second container was revealed. It was sitting upright against the rear wall of the car so that I could only see the nozzle before from my angle. “What is that?” I exclaimed feeling nearly tricked. The man pulled out a blue fuel can labeled “diesel” on its front. I took it from him and gestured back to my gunner asking if this was what he’d seen as we rolled by the first time. He affirmed.

The men erupted in foreign explanation and I overrode their clamor asking defiantly “What is this?” Finally the man recalled the English word that had seemed to quell tensions once already. “Water! Water!” Another man grabbed the container and brought the nozzle to his nose in attempt to illustrate “yes water!” I took the container and put the nozzle to my nose. It reeked of fuel. “This is NOT water!!” I exclaimed defiantly. Whether for communication barrier or intentional deceit, I did not like being lied to and was just about done with diplomacy. One of the men must have sensed the level of my disdain because in a risky move he suddenly stepped forward, grabbed the container from my hand, put the nozzle to his mouth and drank from the container right there. As soon as he did that all the hubbub ceased. I think the men were just as shocked as I was with his desperate attempt.

I can’t remember for sure but I think the shock of seeing the man suddenly drink from a fuel container along with the stunned silence that ensued in such a tense situation forced a quick smile from my face. All I could think was ‘oh my goodness What The Heck…??? This man is crazy.’ It was such a relieving and shocking moment at the same time that I think I actually laughed aloud just quickly. Considering that the guys could be suicide bombers, and therefore willing to drink gasoline, I took the can and smelled it one more time. It still smelled like gas. So I poured some onto the ground and smelled it. It was transparent and had no smell.

An Iraqi man at a short distance had noticed the commotion and joined in the crowd by this time. He was well dressed and probably a teacher, which would mean he probably had some level of English ability. He got the story from the other men and commenced to explain to me in better, though not fluent, English that one of the vehicles had broken down and they were pushing it. The water in the container was for the radiator. He had poured some of the water onto a scarf because it was so hot and they were using it to cool themselves.

We got a good laugh out of that as we headed back into camp. When we were overheard on the radio confirming “no threat” people wanted to know what they’d missed and they got a kick out of the deal too. I think part of the humor was the sheer relief factor. One thing I’m very sure about, as I have always been, I do not like bombs. Give me a small arms firefight any day where I stand a skilled chance, just leave the bombs to the explosive ordinance guys that get the big bucks for it.

Hey everybody. I just wanted to say Happy 4th of July. I suppose it's ironic that I was clueless about what holiday it was. I overheard a news television station mention something about "going into the holiday weekend" and I thought to myself, "is there a holiday coming up? I wonder which one?"
Can you believe that? That's just the way it is here. Everyday's the same. No weekends, holidays, sick days, or anything different. Always a work day. Pretty dull I know. But then again, dull around here is a very good thing.
They did decorate the chow hall in red, white, and blue though so I guess not everything's the same.
Well pop off some fireworks for me while you're out celebrating. Much love from Baghdad!

Oh by the way, I don't think I formally introduced you to this new version of my page. Pretty cool huh? I like it a lot. Once again my man B-Dubs comes through with his cyber skills. Thanks Diddy. I wanted to be able to add pics for visual effect but I still have not managed to be able to upload any photos on this internet connection. The few that are available to you now were uploaded before arriving here in country. I'm still working on it though. I especially like how the banner photo at the top of this page toggles between two photos when you log on. Those pics by the way are of my squad conducting building clearing operations. I'm not in the pic because I was ill that day and unable to participate so I took pictures while supervising my boys.

Stay tuned. I've got a story coming...

One early morning last week I went to my truck to begin the day’s work and relieve the overnight shift guys when I saw them all gathered in a huddle ogling over something. Normally, I’d not have thought twice about that type of boyish giddiness that usually means whatever is going on, I’ll wind up being responsible for or having to answer if I get involved. But this excitement was unusually energetic and eventually I caved and went over to see what the fuss was about. So I enter the circle and look in the middle at the object that has captured the full attention of each and ever soldier. It’s a signed photograph of one of the soldiers in that circle holding a Seattle Super Sonic NBA Cheerleader in a carrying position posing for the camera.

I quickly learned what it seems everyone else had long been privy to; the fact that the Super Sonic Cheerleaders were HERE in our very own camp the night before. That day happened to be a rare and very much needed day off for me so I had locked myself away in my barracks and refused to answer the door the several times someone knocked on it throughout the day. Consequently, I never got the news. I didn’t even leave my barracks to eat that day.
The question I keep wondering is what kind of a twisted person gets the great idea to send a group of beautiful young provocatively clad women into a herd of overstressed, overworked, sexually deprived and frustrated soldiers to strut and dance and tease? Though I may well have gone to see them myself had I known, if only for the sheer fact of the rare entertainment opportunity, I’m glad I didn’t. I must admit it was quite frustrating for the next three days to listen to everyone’s stories about getting to hold one for the camera and getting to dance with them and such and being completely out of the loop. Sheesh.

The sand/dust storms here are something fierce. And they happen so suddenly just out of nowhere. One minute you’re standing there in the middle of conversation when a gusty breeze blows up dust and sand in your face. Then the gust settles and you open your eyes and can’t see a hundred feet in front of you (typically, although they’ve been much denser than that). It’s like being in a brown hazy fog. Working at night (as I often do) everything in your immediate area may still seem clear so if you’re not paying attention you may not make much notice of it until morning light. I discovered that first hand. It was the middle of the night so I didn’t notice when I walked for about 5 minutes from one building to another. When I got back inside and saw a mirror, my eyelashes and eyebrows where white and my hair looked as though I had put in blonde highlights. The hair on my legs was white. Now that’s a scary sight. It’s especially bad when we’re stuck working outside in it for hours on end. The dust is so fine and gets in EVERYTHING. It coats the insides of your ears and turns nose hairs that you didn’t know you had white. We look especially funny walking around in full camouflage from head to toe with bright blue or white surgical masks on. We can only pray that our touchy plumbing is working when we get a chance to go shower that day. No one wants to be the person still wearing the previous day’s dust highlights the day after. It would be kind of hard to play that off.

In other news, Toby Keith was here last week. He was actually scheduled to do a meet and greet autograph signing right here on our camp. That’s notable since our camp is so small, discreet, and highly secured due to the nature of our work. One could easily walk between the two furthest points of the camp within 20 minutes to give you an idea. I wouldn’t be categorized as a country music fan for sure but I do like some of it. In fact I’ve had two country songs on my computer and both happened to be by Toby Keith so I was kind of excited to hear about the signing. Unfortunately, it was cancelled. He did however, perform a free concert the next day at a neighboring camp. Of course I had to work so was unable to attend. Some of the other guys managed to get someone to cover their shift for them so they could go. Of course for most all of them there was some price to pay since nobody is particularly eager to work during their precious off time. But who could not be won over by some of Toby Keith’s moving patriotic songs like American Soldier and The Taliban Song? As you might guess, there are some (and by that I mean A LOT) avid country fans and certainly among those are plenty of Toby Keith fanatics. So it was a big deal and a serious morale booster for a lot of people. Especially since someone in my unit had connections with the people providing Keith's security and was able to get everyone from only my unit a special trip after the concert to meet Keith and get autographs and such. That was surely awesome for them.

 Happy Mother's Day to all you mothers and wives out there nurturing and upholding your families. You've got the most honorable job in the world if you ask me.

Okay friends and family; first off let me say that I am very sorry for the extended delay of this post. I certainly didn’t mean to leave you hangin’ like that. There have been some irregularities in our scheduling, among other things, that have restricted my access to the internet more than usual. That has all finally been resolved and it appears that things will be back on a ‘normal’ basis.

Let me say right off the bat that everything here is fine and we are all okay. I know from individual correspondence with some of you that the media has reported escalated violence involving my unit. The reports have been accurate. Over the past week and a half and as late as days ago, we have encountered mortar fire, IEDs, and small arms fire. I’m especially sorry to those of you who received those reports and have been worried about me as a result, having to wait this long to hear from me. No one here was hurt in any of those incidents and things have already gotten back to normal. Rest assured that we are all safe and sound. It’s not the first time since I’ve been here that our base has been attacked with mortar fire. Please try not to worry too much. We are prepared for such attacks and are likely safer than you might imagine in those types of events.

We’ve continued to have our manpower boosted by incoming attachments. The most recent handful were formally active duty guys who’d already served the active portion of their terms (usually 4 years) and were recalled for this deployment during their inactive reserve portion (whatever remained after the active portion of an 8 year contract). Some of them only had months of their contract remaining. I can’t imagine what it would be like being called up after I thought I’d left my military life behind and was well set in to my civilian life and career. But it’s part of the contract I signed and if duty calls, then I’ll be there. The bottom line is that I’m happy to serve when I’m needed.

It didn’t take long for it to get hot here. The funny thing is how suddenly it goes from cold to hot. One day we are bundling up with all kinds of cold weather gear and such, especially at night. Then all within a day or two we’ve got air conditioners on full blast and are building shade covers all over the place.

As time goes on we’re finding ways to enjoy life during our down time. They have an open mic night once a week where people recite poetry and do pretty much anything someone feels like doing that might entertain a small crowd. Many of the guys have organized a flag football team that plays against the teams of other units on this little dirt area that’s probably about 25 yards long at most. There’s one building we use for any type of event or meetings or classes as necessary that has been turned into a virtual club one night a week. That’s how it’s becoming to be referred to; “the club”. It’s funny because people are inviting you to “the club” and you show up to a emptied out tin building with someone’s laptop hooked up to a couple large speakers and the lights off with a few soldiers (in uniform mind you). Not exactly what you picture when you’re going to the club. But we make stuff like that work. We have to. Some guys have gotten together and are offering lessons in grappling and boxing. We’ve built a volleyball court with sandbags and poles and other materials found around here. I built myself a headboard with a shelf for my bunk to have a place to hang the pictures people are sending me and just for fun.

I’m usually on duty throughout the evenings so I haven’t attended much of the base activities but I generally prefer more solitary activities anyway, like sleep?. Well I do a little more than that. I like to read books and mail. Probably one of my favorite things to do is watch TV series’ on DVD on my laptop. I’m so hooked on about 3 shows. I’m on Season 4 of the 6 that I have (I’m not sure if 6 is the last one made or not) of the show ‘24’. I’m trying to pace myself because I don’t know what I’m going to do when I get to the end. I’ve already completed all of Smallville and I’m working through ‘Lost’. These shows are addictive because instead of isolated episodes, they’re one long story. It’s like a 24 hour movie. Speaking of movies, between all of us here (and by now just about every one here owns a laptop) we probably collectively have a good percentage of every movie ever made on our hard drives in the barracks. People just go around swapping with each other via thumb drives and such.

Aside from those things there’s always staying fit. As is typical when my body is in combat mode/condition my appetite has tripled. I weigh more now than I ever have. I’m trying to learn to eat cleaner so that this monster appetite of mine doesn’t translate into body fat.

So that’s it for now. Once again I’m sorry for the delay. Thanks for sticking with me. It really does mean a lot. Adding to this blog and reading the comments is a major source of motivation for me. I’ll be in touch again sooner than later. I love the continued care packages and letters and emails and thoughts and prayers. I’ve said it before and it continues to prove true; I’ve been blessed with some of the best friends in the world!

-EJ

It was sobering to land in Kuwait and board the buses to be told immediately that our route was red and we'd have to sit in place for what turned out to be more than 12 hours. When we finally received the go ahead and arrived at our camp site, we received our in-brief, which started something like "Welcome to Kuwait. You are now in a combat zone." It then proceeded to review the current combat status and recent attacks etc. I may never forget those opening words.

'This is it' I thought to myself. The place where all the years of training and simulations gets real. Where the effectiveness of my leadership over my squad over the last six months and the skill level and battle readiness of the squad will be tested and any deficiency could be tragic. Sobering and chilling at the same time.

The flight to Iraq from Kuwait is certainly one that won't be forgotten by anyone on that plane. All was normal until we began our combat descent. I’ve experienced that before so I expected the extra turbulence and harsh craft maneuvers. We were literally crammed in the C-130 as tightly as we could get. The phrase “like a can of sardines” immediately comes to mind. So tightly we sat in fact, that we had to place all of our gear (weapons, fully-loaded assault packs, etc.) in our laps and most of us could not get our seatbelts on. I was so squished that with my hands in fornt of me, I couldn’t reach in my lap to grab my camera. On descent, the plane for one brief moment dropped suddenly and steeply enough that I felt my tummy go up into my chest. You know that feeling just ast you top the highest point on a roller coaster ride and start the drop. That’s the feeling. Most everyone else was asleep at this point. I gathered myself and tried to keep my cool, reminding myself ‘You’ve done this before. You know to expect it. It’s all controlled and there is no disaster. Relax. Breathe. Control yourself.’ But no one was prepared for what happened next. The plane suddenly dropped again as if all lift and engine controls had just vanished all at once. Again I felt my stomach shoot up into my sternum. But this time, it kept going and I watched the assault pack (essentially a backpack by the way) in my lap along with other nearby loose items rise up right off of my lap into the air. Then it dawned on me that I could no longer feel the seat beneath me. I hadn’t quite noticed it at first because we were all still relatively at each others’ eye level, but we were all suspended in air! Everyone suddenly awoke to find themselves free-falling in mid-air inside the hull of this huge plane! I started grasping for something to hold myself down when I saw that we were all steadily drifting upward toward the sieling. Just then everything came crashing downward. But as we hit the seats, the G-force felt as if it would push us right down through our seats and out the belly of the plane smashing us downward. By this time my brain was in high gear trying to decipher what was happening. The prevailing thought was that we were in evasive  maneuver dodging enemy fire. I noticed something lying on top of my sassault pack on my lap that I hadn’t noticed before. During the shifting , an army green oxygen mask pouch had fallen from the plane wall where they haung and landed right under my nose. I stared at it a moment puzzled, wondering if that was just a spooky coincidence or if that was by design and I was supposed to be catching the hint. Then I quickly snatched it and tucked it close to my body realizing that either way didn’t really matter at this point. I spotted the others still hanging on the wall and started mentally preparing for disaster and how I mighth render aid. Those masks were my primary objective. The plane banked a hard and sharp left and then finally settled in for a swift landing. I braced for a head-rattling impact but it was remarkably smooth and controlled for what we’d just experienced. It turned out that the whole experience was just another planned combat landing.

So here I am, back here in same place I was last year (one and a half week ago). People ask me repeatedly "did you have a good break?" Well I'm here to tell you that in this place a break, by definition, is good. Tougher saying goodbye this time with the uncertainties and extended journey ahead. I saw a LOT of old friends and it just doesn't get much better than that for me. Sadly, I missed quite a few as well. It felt like being able to re-enter a past life but for just one last moment. That life is gone for now. This is my new life- an american soldier at war. Time to put aside all the emotions, rewards, setbacks, and complexities of those times. these times are much simpler. There is only one path now, one decision, one team, one fight, and one mission. I'm taking my soldiers to war and I'm bringing them back to their families.

Many of them (fellow soldiers) got married over our week long break. One of my younger brothers had my new baby nephew, Achim, a few months ago. I've got many friends graduating from schools this semester. Some looking for new jobs and others moving to new countries. To each, in his/her respective situation, that is the most important thing in the world right now.

I often feel like I'm sitting in the bleachers of a big empty stadium and the world is on the field and I'm just watching it turn. It's a horrifying and beautiful thing to see from this perspective. From new parents devoting themselves to child rearing in one place to the little convenience store getting knocked off around the way. From broken hearts to the highest forms of elation. It is just one intense work of art. And though I know I'm etched into a micro sized speck of it, it can seem as though I am completely separated; isolated in a world of my own on an entirely different playing field.

I have but a couple weeks or so left in this fair country. Just a fleeting amount of time before the training portion is over and the execution, what all this training has been for, begins. Between now and then, I've got to make sure that I'm sure that I'm sure that me and my guys are the best prepared for whatever may come our way as humanly possible.